Our mission is promote recovery and sober living. We do this by creating an environment where you can put your recovery first, providing a safe structured place where you can recover from a hopeless state of mind and body.
If we don’t care who will?
People come into sober living at a low point in their lives. Some of them show up hoping there’s a chance at a better life. Some of them don’t even have any hope left, they just know they have to do something different. Some of them haven’t had a non-drug using or drinking friend in years, and now they learn how to have friends sober because there are a dozen other people in the house. People who haven’t had a regular job in years find work, show up reliably, and become fully self-supporting. Women who have always leaned on a man for their habits and survival find they can support themselves. Men who have never cared about anything other than themselves gain integrity and compassion. Most importantly, people learn how to live a life free of drugs and alcohol, and actually enjoy it.
What is our why?
One gentleman came to us after 15 years in prison. He had been locked up as long as I’ve been sober. I remember picking him up from the bus station, the morning he got out. I thought about all the technology and life events that have happened in the last 15 years. The first time he saw a cellphone he wasn’t sure what it was—they didn’t have Smart Phones back in 2005 (remember that back then all the phones had buttons).
Being out of prison after 15 years was a culture shock for him. Fortunately, he had the opportunity for sober living, because it meant he was with a number of guys who understand what he is going through. Compassion is a by-product of sober living: current members reach out to the new guy with an honest willingness to help the next guy in line. He wasn’t alone as he figured out how to function in a world that was brand new to him, he had people living with him that were eager to help him adjust.
Because he had a safe and structured place to experience life clean and sober outside of prison, he learned how to function in society again. In his case, he didn’t just strengthen his recovery—he found the help he needed to live life outside of prison. We can’t get through this life alone, and yet addicts and alcoholics many times aren’t good at asking for help. Because he came to sober living, he found the help he didn’t know he needed.
Not everyone gets it the first time.
Not everyone gets recovery the first time around. One gentleman was in our program, following enough guidelines to be able to stay but not really taking his recovery seriously. He moved out of the house because of a personality conflict that he wasn’t willing to find solutions for. In a short time he was drinking again, went back to jail a few times, and ended up homeless & unemployed. His ego was too large to let him call me to come back.
He showed up at the house he used to live in hoping we held onto his stimulus payment, and I just happened to be there. We started talking, and it appeared that he was finally tired of the life he’d been living, but he was too prideful to ask if he could come back. He asked me for other sober living houses in town, & I started to give him the ones I know of. He stopped writing in the middle of a phone number, looked me square in the eye, and said, “Can I just come back here?”
Of course I said yes, and immediately he was a different person than the first time around. Sometimes people need deeper bottoms before they are willing to start building the foundation of their recovery, and that was the case with this guy. Since then, he has been an excellent member in the house. He works with a sponsor, is always willing to help other guys, is gainfully employed, set up a payment plan to get current with us, and has followed through. Most poignantly, however, he walked through the death of his mother without taking a drink or a drug. Because he had the support of the house and actively works a 12-step program, he was there for his mother in her last days, was able to be the son that she deserved.